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All you need is love...

The Goddess According to Myers-Briggs

INFP...or ENFP?

Love


Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love. -- Rainer Maria Rilke

Idealist NF's
Healer Idealests (INFP's)
The INFP Personality Portrait
The INFP Personality
The INFP Relationship Profile
INFP Strengths
INFP Weaknesses
INFP's as Lovers
INFP's as Friends
INFP's as Parents
Famous INFP's
Links to the Tests

Links to All Personality Types

Far away there in the sky are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and follow where they lead. -- Louisa May Alcott


THE KEIRSEY TEMPERAMENT SORTER

(Based on the Myers-Briggs Personality Test)



I have taken the Keirsey Temperament Sorter test (which is based on the Myers-Briggs test) several times with two different results I have scored both as an INFP and an ENFP...

So, unless there such a thing as a schizophrenic I/ENFP (or would they just be nice and call me "flexible"?), I'm choosing this one because I scored as an INFP slightly more times than an ENFP and because it sounds more like me...

I always knew I was rare and quite unique (a rather sophisticated way of saying you've probably never met anyone quite like me... LOL), but 1%??? Eeeeeek I really am a "stranger in a strange land"!

Here are the best INFP personality profiles that I've found on the Internet in the last few years, along with links to take the actual tests following.

LOVE


INFP PROFILES FOR IDEALIST NF'S AND HEALER IDEALISTS




IDEALIST NF's

(8-10% of the Population One of the basic 4 Myers-Briggs Personality Types)


Idealist NFs, being ABSTRACT in communicating and COOPERATIVE in implementing goals, can become highly skilled in DIPLOMATIC INTEGRATION. Thus their most practiced and developed intelligent operations are usually teaching and counseling (NFJ mentoring), or conferring and tutoring (NFP advocating). And they would if they could be sages in one of these forms of social development. The Idealist temperaments have an instinct for interpersonal integration, learn ethics with ever increasing zeal, sometimes become diplomatic leaders, and often speak interpretively and metaphorically of the abstract world of their imagination.

They are proud of themselves in the degree they are authentic in action, respect themselves in the degree they are benevolent, and feel confident of themselves in the degree they are empathic. Idealist types search for their unique identity, hunger for deep and meaningful relationships, wish for a little romance each day, trust their intuitive feelings implicitly, aspire for profundity. This is the "Identity Seeking Personality" credulous about the future, mystical about the past, and their preferred time and place are the future and the pathway. Educationally they go for the humanities, vocationally for ethics, and vocationally for personnel work.

Social relationships: In their family interactions they strive for mutuality, provide spiritual intimacy for the mates, opportunity for fantasy for their children, and for themselves continuous self-renewal. Idealists do not abound, being as few as 8% and no more than 10% of the population.


HEALER IDEALISTS (INFP's)

(1% of the Population One of 16 Myers-Briggs Personality Types, a sub-category of the Idealist NF's)


Healer Idealists are abstract in thought and speech, cooperative in striving for their ends, and informative and introverted in their interpersonal relations. Healers present a seemingly tranquil, and noticeably pleasant face to the world, and though to all appearances they might seem reserved, and even shy, on the inside they are anything but reserved, having a capacity for caring not always found in other types. They care deeply indeed, passionately about a few special persons or a favorite cause, and their fervent aim is to bring peace and integrity to their loved ones and the world.

Healers have a profound sense of idealism derived from a strong personal morality, and they conceive of the world as an ethical, honorable place. Indeed, to understand INFP's, we must understand their idealism as almost boundless and selfless, inspiring them to make extraordinary sacrifices for someone or something they believe in. The INFP is the Prince or Princess of fairy tale, the King's Champion or Defender of the Faith, like Sir Galahad or Joan of Arc. Healers are found in only 1% of the general population, although, at times, their idealism leaves them feeling even more isolated from the rest of humanity.

Healers seek unity in their lives, unity of body and mind, emotions and intellect, perhaps because they are likely to have a sense of inner division threaded through their lives, which comes from their often unhappy childhood. Healers live a fantasy-filled childhood, which, unfortunately, is discouraged or even punished by many parents. In a practical-minded family, required by their parents to be sociable and industrious in concrete ways, and also given down-to-earth siblings who conform to these parental expectations, INFP's come to see themselves as ugly ducklings. Other types usually shrug off parental expectations that do not fit them, but not the INFP's. Wishing to please their parents and siblings, but not knowing quite how to do it, they try to hide their differences, believing they are bad to be so fanciful, so unlike their more solid brothers and sisters. They wonder, some of them for the rest of their lives, whether they are OK. They are quite OK, just different from the rest of their family swans reared in a family of ducks. Even so, to realize and really believe this is not easy for them. Deeply committed to the positive and the good, yet taught to believe there is evil in them, INFP's can come to develop a certain fascination with the problem of good and evil, sacred and profane. Tutors are drawn toward purity, but can become engrossed with the profane, continuously on the lookout for the wickedness that lurks within them. Then, when INFP's believe they have yielded to an impure temptation, they may be given to acts of self-sacrifice in atonement. Others seldom detect this inner turmoil, however, for the struggle between good and evil is within the INFP, who does not feel compelled to make the issue public.


LOVE


THE INFP PERSONALITY PORTRAIT

The Myers-Briggs Personality Page

INFP's are quiet, creative, sensitive, and perceptive souls who often strike others as shy, reserved, and cool. These folks have a rare capacity for deep caring and commitment both to the people and causes they idealize. INFP's guide their behavior by a strong inner sense of values, rather than by conventional logic and reason. Forced to cope with this facts-and-figures "real" world we inhabit, INFP's may appear to have been imported from another galaxy! They gravitate toward creative or human service careers which allow them to use their instinctive sense of empathy and remarkable communication skills. Strongly religious, spiritual or philosophical people, INFP's may see the purpose of their lives as an inner journey, quest or personal unfolding. More practical or rational types may tend to discredit the INFP's sources of understanding as mystical. The search for a soul mate is a preoccupation for many INFP's, who must balance their need for privacy and peace with their yearning for human connection. If there seems to be an air of sadness in the INFP's spirit, blame it on this type's longing for the perfect in all things.


The INFP Personality

As an INFP, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is external, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.

INFP's, more than other iNtuitive Feeling types, are focused on making the world a better place for people. Their primary goal is to find out their meaning in life. What is their purpose? How can they best serve humanity in their lives? They are idealists and perfectionists, who drive themselves hard in their quest for achieving the goals they have identified for themselves.

INFP's are highly intuitive about people. They rely heavily on their intuitions to guide them, and use their discoveries to constantly search for value in life. They are on a continuous mission to find the truth and meaning underlying things. Every encounter and every piece of knowledge gained gets sifted through the INFP's value system, and is evaluated to see if it has any potential to help the INFP define or refine their own path in life. The goal at the end of the path is always the same the INFP is driven to help people and make the world a better place.

Generally thoughtful and considerate, INFP's are good listeners and put people at ease. Although they may be reserved in expressing emotion, they have a very deep well of caring and are genuinely interested in understanding people. This sincerity is sensed by others, making the INFP a valued friend and confidante. An INFP can be quite warm with people he or she knows well.

INFP's do not like conflict, and go to great lengths to avoid it. If they must face it, they will always approach it from the perspective of their feelings. In conflict situations, INFP's place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. They focus on the way that the conflict makes them feel, and indeed don't really care whether or not they're right. They don't want to feel badly. This trait sometimes makes them appear irrational and illogical in conflict situations. On the other hand, INFP's make very good mediators, and are typically good at solving other people's conflicts, because they intuitively understand people's perspectives and feelings, and genuinely want to help them.

INFP's are flexible and laid-back, until one of their values is violated. In the face of their value system being threatened, INFP's can become aggressive defenders, fighting passionately for their cause. When an INFP has adopted a project or job which they're interested in, it usually becomes a "cause" for them. Although they are not detail-oriented individuals, they will cover every possible detail with determination and vigor when working for their "cause".

When it comes to the mundane details of life maintenance, INFP's are typically completely unaware of such things. They might go for long periods without noticing a stain on the carpet, but carefully and meticulously brush a speck of dust off of their project booklet.

INFP's do not like to deal with hard facts and logic. Their focus on their feelings and the Human Condition makes it difficult for them to deal with impersonal judgment. They don't understand or believe in the validity of impersonal judgement, which makes them naturally rather ineffective at using it. Most INFP's will avoid impersonal analysis, although some have developed this ability and are able to be quite logical. Under stress, it's not uncommon for INFP's to mis-use hard logic in the heat of anger, throwing out fact after (often inaccurate) fact in an emotional outburst.

INFP's have very high standards and are perfectionists. Consequently, they are usually hard on themselves, and don't give themselves enough credit. INFP's may have problems working on a project in a group, because their standards are likely to be higher than other members of the group. In group situations, they may have a "control" problem. The INFP needs to work on balancing their high ideals with the requirements of every day living. Without resolving this conflict, they will never be happy with themselves, and they may become confused and paralyzed about what to do with their lives.

INFP's are usually talented writers. They may be awkward and uncomfortable with expressing themselves verbally, but have a wonderful ability to define and express what they're feeling on paper. INFP's also appear frequently in social service professions, such as counselling or teaching. They are at their best in situations where they're working towards the public good, and in which they don't need to use hard logic.

INFP's who function in their well-developed sides can accomplish great and wonderful things, which they will rarely give themselves credit for. Some of the great, humanistic catalysts in the world have been INFP's.


LOVE


THE INFP RELATIONSHIP PROFILE

The Myers-Briggs Personality Relationships Page

INFP's present a calm, pleasant face to the world. They appear to be tranquil and peaceful to others, with simple desires. In fact, the INFP internally feels his or her life intensely. In the relationship arena, this causes them to have a very deep capacity for love and caring which is not frequently found with such intensity in the other types. The INFP does not devote their intense feelings towards just anyone, and are relatively reserved about expressing their inner-most feelings. They reserve their deepest love and caring for a select few who are closest to them. INFP's are generally laid-back, supportive and nurturing in their close relationships. With Introverted Feeling dominating their personality, they're very sensitive and in-tune with people's feelings, and feel genuine concern and caring for others. Slow to trust others and cautious in the beginning of a relationship, an INFP will be fiercely loyal once they are committed. With their strong inner core of values, they are intense individuals who value depth and authenticity in their relationships, and hold those who understand and accept the INFP's perspectives in especially high regard. INFP's are usually adaptable and congenial, unless one of their ruling principles has been violated, in which case they stop adapting and become staunch defenders of their values. They will be uncharacteristically harsh and rigid in such a situation.



INFP STRENGTHS

Most INFP's will exhibit the following strengths with regards to relationship issues:


INFP WEAKNESSES

Most INFP's will exhibit the following weaknesses with regards to relationship issues:


INFP'S AS LOVERS

"To love means to open ourselves to the negative as well as the positive to grief, sorrow, and disappointment as well as to joy, fulfillment, and an intensity of consciousness we did not know was possible before."
Rollo May


INFP's feel tremendous loyalty and commitment to their relationships. With the Feeling preference dominating their personality, harmony and warm feelings are central to the INFP's being. They feel a need to be in a committed, loving relationship. If they are not involved in such a relationship, the INFP will be either actively searching for one, or creating one in their own minds.

INFP's tendency to be idealistic and romantically-minded may cause them to fantasize frequently about a "more perfect" relationship or situation. They may also romanticize their mates into having qualities which they do not actually possess. Most INFP's have a problem with reconciling their highly idealistic and romantic views of life with the reality of their own lives, and so they are constantly somewhat unsettled with themselves and with their close personal relationships. However, the INFP's deeply-felt, sincere love for their mates and their intense dislike of conflict keeps the INFP loyal to their relationships, in spite of their troubles achieving peace of mind.

Unlike other types who tend to hold their mates up on a pedestal, the INFP's tendency to do so does not really turn into a negative thing in the relationship. INFP's hold tightly to their ideals, and work hard at constantly seeing their mates up on that pedestal. The frequent INFP result is a strongly affirming, proud and affectionate attitude towards their mates which stands the test of time.

INFP's are not naturally interested in administrative matters such as bill-paying and house-cleaning, but they can be very good at performing these tasks when they must. They can be really good money managers when they apply themselves.

Sexually, the INFP is likely to be initially slow to open up to their mates. Once their trust has been earned, the INFP will view sexual intimacy as an opportunity for expressing their deep-seated love and affection. Even more than the actual sexual act, they will value giving and receiving love and sweet words. With their tendency to enjoy serving others, they may value their mates satisfaction above their own.

One real problem area for the INFP is their intensive dislike of conflict and criticism. The INFP is quick to find a personal angle in any critical comment, whether or not anything personal was intended. They will tend to take any sort of criticism as a personal attack on their character, and will usually become irrational and emotional in such situations. This can be a real problem for INFP's who are involved with persons who have Thinking and Judging preferences. TJ's relate to others with a objective, decisive attitude that frequently shows an opinion on the topic of conversation. If the opinion is negative, the TJ's attitude may be threatening to the INFP, who will tend to respond emotionally to the negativity and be vaguely but emphatically convinced that the negativity is somehow the INFP's fault.

For INFP's with extremely dominant Feeling preferences who have not developed their Intuitive sides sufficiently to gather good data for their decision making processes, their dislike of conflict and criticism can foretell doom and gloom for intimate relationships. These INFP's will react with extreme emotional distress to conflict situations, and will not know what to do about it. Since they will have no basis for determining what action to take, they will do whatever they can to get rid of the conflict which frequently means lashing out irrationally at others, or using guilt manipulation to get their mates to give them the positive support that they crave. This kind of behavior does not bode well for healthy, long-term relationships. Individuals who recognize this tendency in themselves should work on their ability to take criticism objectively rather than personally. They should also try to remember that conflict situations are not always their fault, and they're definitely not the end of the world. Conflict is a fact of life, and facing it and addressing it immediately avoids having to deal with it in the future, after it has become a much larger problem.

INFP's are very aware of their own space, and the space of others. They value their personal space, and the freedom to do their own thing. They will cherish the mate who sees the INFP for who they are, and respects their unique style and perspectives. The INFP is not likely to be overly jealous or possessive, and is likely to respect their mate's privacy and independence. In fact, the INFP is likely to not only respect their mate's perspectives and goals, but to support them with loyal firmness.

In general, INFP's are warmly affirming and loving partners who make the health of their relationships central in their lives. Although cautious in the beginning, they become firmly loyal to their committed relationships, which are likely to last a lifetime. They take their relationships very seriously, and will put forth a great deal of effort into making them work.

Although two well-developed individuals of any type can enjoy a healthy relationship, INFP's natural partner is the ENTJ, or the ENFJ.



INFP'S AS FRIENDS

INFP's are warm and caring individuals who highly value authenticity and depth in their personal relationships. They are usually quite perceptive about other people's feelings and motives, and are consequently able to get along with all sorts of different people. However, the INFP will keep their true selves reserved from others except for a select few, with whom they will form close and lasting friendships. With their high ideals, they are likely to be drawn to other iNtuitive Feelers for their closer friendships.

With their strong need for harmony and dislike of conflict, INFP's may feel threatened by people with strong Judging and Thinking preferences. Although they're likely to be able to work well professionally with such individuals, they may have difficulty accepting or appreciating them on a personal level. They generally feel a kinship and affinity with other Feeling types.

INFP's will be valued by their confidantes as genuine, altruistic, deep, caring, original individuals.



INFP'S AS PARENTS

"You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth...
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable."
Kahlil Gibran

INFP's are "natural" parents. They accept and enjoy the parental role, seeing it as the natural extension of their value systems. They make use of the parental role for developing and defining their values further, and consider it their task to pass their values on to their children. They take their role quite seriously. Warm, affirming, and flexible, the INFP generally makes a gentle and easy-going parent in many respects.

INFP's do not like conflict situations, and will keep themselves flexible and diverse to promote a positive, conflict-free environment in their home. The INFP is not naturally prone to dole out punishment or discipline, and so is likely to adapt to their mate's disciplinary policy, or to rely on their mates to administer discipline with the children. In the absence of a mating parent, the INFP will need to make a conscious effort of creating a structure for their children to live within.

Although the INFP dislikes punishing others, they hold strong values and will not tolerate the violation of a strongly-held belief. If they feel that their child has truly committed a wrong, the INFP parent will not have a problem administering discipline. They will directly confront the child, stubbornly digging in their heels and demanding recourse.

The INFP parent is likely to value their children as individuals, and to give them room for growth. They will let the children have their own voice and place in the family.

Extremely loving and devoted parents, INFP's will fiercely protect and support their children. If there is an issue involving "taking sides", you can bet the INFP will always be loyal to their children.

INFP's are usually remembered by their children as loving, patient, devoted, and flexible parents.



FAMOUS INFP'S

William Shakespeare, bard of Avon
Anne Frank, author (The Diary of a Young Girl)
Helen Keller, author
Laura Ingalls Wilder, author (Little House on the Prairie)
Amy Tan, author (The Joy-Luck Club, The Kitchen God's Wife)
Annie Dillard, author (Pilgrim at Tinker Creek)
A. A. Milne, author, poet (Winnie the Pooh)
Homer, epic poet (The Iliad, The Odyssey)
Virgil (Publius Vergilius Maro), poet (The Aeneid)
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, poet (Evangeline)
James Herriot, veterinarian, author (All Creatures Great and Small)
Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, former U.S. first lady
John F. Kennedy, Jr.
Tom Brokaw, news anchor
Carl Rogers, reflective psychologist, counselor
Joyce Brothers, psychologist
Erik Erikson, developmental psychologist
Audrey Hepburn, actress (Breakfast at Tiffany's)
Julia Roberts, actress (Pretty Woman)
Jodie Foster, actress (Silence of the Lambs)
Judy Garland, actress (The Wizard of Oz)
Helen Hunt, actress
Donna Reed, actress (It's a Wonderful Life)
Megan Follows, actress (Anne of Green Gables)
Lisa Kudrow, actress ("Friends")
Scott Bakula, actor ("Quantum Leap")
Fred Savage, actor ("The Wonder Years")
Terri Gross, radio talkshow host (PBS's "Fresh Air")
Dick Clark, television emcee ("American Bandstand")
James Taylor, singer/songwriter
Neil Diamond, singer/songwriter



LOVE


The Links to the Tests:
Keirsey Temperament Sorter (Based on the Myers-Briggs Personality Test)
The Myers-Briggs Personality Page


Other Personality Tests:
Links to Other Free Personality Tests on the Internet


The Links to Descriptions of All Personality Types:
The Sixteeen Type Personality Portaits (the best in-depth descriptions)
The Sixteeen Myers-Briggs Types (and the Nine Enneagram Types)
The Sixteeen Myers-Briggs Types from TypeLogic
Relationships Between the Types (type in combinations of two types for results)


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